Perfect Storm

As a Vikings fan, I will do my best to sort out my thoughts. Background:

The 2011-12 (yes, this season does extend into the new year) Vikings team is a team where the "window has closed". They/We really didn't get over the Saints loss and now the team is really old.

There is a stadium issue in that one needs to be built soon. A team with promising players would help. We would bitch and moan about it now and then talk about how great foresight the ownership/leadership had when we got back to our 9-7, 10-6 regular season standard.

BEFORE THE VIKINGS GAME AGAINST THE REDSKINS ON 12/24/2011: We had/have some good young players in Harvin, Peterson, Rudolph, and I will even throw Ponder into that mix. At best, I thought he would be as good as Kramer. At best. He is, however, a QB that isn't complete trash, so we hopefully don't have to worry about that position for ages.

As of yesterday morning, 12/24/2011, the Vikings were in the hunt for the #1 overall pick in the 2012 draft. Since we had Ponder, if we got that pick, we could have easily held that out for king's ransom and gotten bids from 3 or 4 teams. If you don't believe me, see what the Rams get for the #1 overall, if they get it. Search the internet now and see what the consensus payout is for that pick. Say what you want about the Vikings Brain Trust, I don't even think they could have fucked this one up. If we didn't get #1, we probably would have gotten some Khalil guy from USC who would have helped to make sure Ponder didn't get snapped in half from the blind side. It looks like we will now draft #3 and who knows what will happen.


AFTER THE VIKINGS GAME AGAINST THE REDSKINS ON 12/24/2011: Ponder is concussed. He is now a future drooler. Not his fault since the O-Line can't block worth shit. Peterson tore his ACL. He won't be same. Before, I had the new stadium being built at 100% easy, now, 50% at best. The rebuilding will take a solid 5-10 years and they might not even be playing here to enjoy the good years. If we had a better pick than #3 this year . . . rebuilding might be quicker.

Hopefully the Minnesota Vikings major rival isn't apathy going forward. That is a tough rival to beat, but an easy one to move away from.

Oh, then I wake up to this headline from my "favorite" sportswriter:

Sid Hartman: Vikings needed to win this game

Well, Merry God Damn Christmas everyone. This is Tebow's birthday or something.

Christ. Fuck.

Finally, a McCown is back at QB

As you may have seen, Josh McCown has been tabbed as this week's starting QB against the Packers.  And I'm sure there are lots of things to say about that such as "GRAB 20 DOLLARS OUT OF MY BILLFOLD AND PUT IT ON THE PACK, I'LL BE DOWN AFTER I BRUSH MY TEETH."

But that's not important to me.  Have you ever thought about the things you do in your life, and wonder if you could possibly look at your life from an outside perspective, exactly what would that life look like?

I'll tell you what it looks like:

I love the internet because you can't hide what you truly are when you are surfing around.  I wish there was an app that just read back every website you visited that day on your way home from work.  Like GPS in your car, but instead of reading directions, the voice just rehashes things you saw.  "Deadspin, Packers press conference, The Hot Glove, Article about how to make two pies at once, How to cure bacon, stomach stapling surgery", etc.

Well, when I logged onto Wikipedia to check out Mr. McCown's illustrious career, I came face to face with my own internet Moment of Clarity.  Look at those visited links.  First, NFL Draft 2002, I mean hey, that's ok.  I wanted to see who the Pack took... AIIIIII those were the Sherman years, weren't they?  Javon Walker... and CRAP.  Anyway, you might expect me to, at one point, at least have clicked on one of those NFL teams to get more information.  Weren't the Bears formerly called the Cardinals or whatever?  What about the Raiders changing cities and Al Davis and all that?  Nope.  Not interested.

But the Hartford Colonials?  Yep, I been there.

It's kind of a realization of life's priorities.  When you see a list of links and the only one you've clicked on is UFL team.  Really puts it in perspective.

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PS, shouldn't even need to point out this paragraph, it's too obvious.

What would you know about it?

IF THE PACKERS LOCK UP THE NUMBER ONE SEED I WILL STILL ENJOY EATING HAM-STEAK.

HAY FANS, 'MEMBER TO WEAR YOUR MOSS JERSEY

I don't get this.

It's a splash page on Vikings.com.  It seems as though it's simply reminding fans to wear purple on Friday, today.  Which is fine... but what's the point?  Do you win something?  Is there some contest on this website where if they see you wearing your Keith Millard jersey at the Applebee's they give you a 20 dollar gift card to the Chicago Dog stand on Concourse B?

This stadium thing has really devolved into comedy.  They are running the "Show Your Horns" ads, trying so desperately to drum up interest in this utterly irrelevant team, all while pushing for support for a new stadium.  My favorite line in the campaign is "We're not fair-weather... we're cold weather."  Yeah, it's absolutely freezing in that dome.

So the team is really pushing for people to get excited... but on the field they are as boring as they have been since I've been alive.  Despite the fact that they play in a dome, they are a running team.  Their defense intercepts passes about as well as Dave Bliznewski and myself could do if given the chance.  They haven't won a division game in.... oh god.  Week 3, 2010?  That can't be right.

But show your horns, fans.  Get out there and sing that "skol" song.  Pretend that those Wade Wilson days meant something.  Wear your purple all over the town, even if everyone laughs at you.  Because with enough support from Dean from Woodbury, Ziggy might just be able to build a new stadium on a munitions dump.

Skol.