June 19, 2011

Cross Post Bonanza

As seen here, I've dug up some gems from olden days, and I feel it's only appropriate to cross-post them on as many blogs as I can. Should I be Tweeting this too?

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A higher-res version of this picture... between this and the Timberwolves' "Buy a can of corn and get free tickets to the game which are actually worth less than the can of corn" promo, I think we've got two pictures to clearly sum up these franchises.


Nobody wants it more than me, huh?
22 days after this issue hit the stands, Randy drove his car the wrong way into construction, over a traffic cop who was ordering him to stop.  Cops found marijuana in his car.  He was charged with assault with a deadly weapon (his Lexus) and possession.  Luckily the "Randy Ratio" really helped his team on the field... to a 6-10 record.



Hey there!  Do yourself a favor and read some of that article.... this kind of stuff in hindsight just makes me giddy. Hey, was there any pressure on you?  If you've never done so, I highly suggest checking out the Esquire article on Todd and his father... great stuff.

Also, who let Ashley Shaeffer into Todd's photo shoot?




Finally, we have Nate Newton. First of all, I did not know that Nate was nicknamed "The Kitchen". Apparently he ballooned up to over 400 pounds after his retirement (not surprising), and had the gastro-bypass surgery, dropping him to a svelte 220. Hey, way to go, Nate.

He also was arrested twice in 2001 for possessing almost 400 GODDAMNED POUNDS OF MARIJUANA.

No wonder he had put on so much weight.  (that was an easy one)

June 6, 2011

Even when the Vikings WIN...

God bless you, Burnsie...you are nothing but gold.  If only we could hear his responses on the 2010 season...






"This game reminds me of a Cleveland Brown game we won at old Met Center."

June 1, 2011

Another update from fans who wanted Jeff George over Randall Cunningham

Well, the Fail-Vikes are failing again, this time by their rookie quarterback hiring none other than Chris Weinke to help them with workouts.

And of course, there's some controversy.  Take it away, commenter:

First, I'd like to point out that the word "Ponder" appeared next to the words "Brees", "Manning" and "Brady" in the same sentence.  Let's try that out for me:

One time, Drew Boatman attempted to grow a mustache and hair appeared on his upper lip like Tom Selleck, Sam Elliott and Wilford Brimley.

Nope, something's wrong there.

But then, he goes and pulls a "Vikings Fan".  When you can't outwardly be racist (and around here, believe me, you can't) you've always got the old fallback... criticize the "work ethic".  Yep.  Harvin is lazy.  So's Rice.  They just don't work hard.  Never mind that they are two of the best players in the NFL at their position.  "LAAAAAAAAAAAAAZY".

I just wish Randall Cunningham had put the time in at the film-room like Jeff George.